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The Story of Blame

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  Blame was the shield. As I pointed my finger, I didn’t have to face what was really inside me. If I was the victim now, I could be the hero later. Blame gave me distance and deflection. Career was the mask. I wanted to say: “I’m responsible now. I’m all grown up. Can’t you see? Don’t the numbers prove it?” A title. A way to pretend. To act as if external success meant internal transformation. It was order on the outside without order on the inside. And then we ask: why do we blame? Why is it so difficult to say, “That was my choice”? We love to own it when it’s in public and things are working in our favor. We love to let everyone know: “I decided that. I was the reason for that success.” But when it comes to failure, I can’t tell you how many fingers I’ve pointed. I can’t even begin to explain the logic I built up—the constructs inside myself—so that I could always find a platform of hope. Because if it didn’t matter what I had done, it was always because of what someone else di...
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The Chair

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Sit Down and Watch An Invitation to the Chair For those who are circling. For those who feel like they’re breaking. For those who’ve tried every strategy, prayer, and plea—and are still met with silence. This is not the end. This is the invitation. The Chair is where the becoming begins. This piece is the opening threshold to the book taking a lifetime to live and write.  No matter how messy or late you feel—if you’re reading this, it’s time. Sit down. And watch. from the book: The Chair, by Sunny Lancaster December 2025 There is a moment in every life—quiet and disruptive all at once—when the ground beneath you stops responding. What once worked no longer works. What once comforted no longer fits. The roles you wore—mother, partner, leader, survivor—feel heavy or hollow, sometimes both. The prayers bounce back. The stories crack. And before you even realize what’s happening, you’re no longer walking forward. You’re circling something. That something is  The Chair . Most peopl...
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